That is a question that I can’t shake, nor can I find an answer to, no matter how hard I try. Destiny is defined in the dictionary as “a power that is believed to control what happens in the future”. Christians don’t believe in destiny because God is the alpha and the omega. He’s already decided what will ever happen before it even does. So, for Christians, there is no destiny but God and His plans, whatever the latter might be. After all, He works in mysterious ways, and no one could ever claim to understand the divine ways.
Others say they believe in fate, but fate is another word for destiny, an almost perfect synonym. So, do you believe in fate or destiny? Do you believe the plans of your very existence have already been drawn and there is absolutely nothing you can do to change them? Do you believe that everything is already predestined?
In the first Matrix, Morpheus asks the protagonist, Neo, if he believes in fate.
“No”, responds Neo.
“Why not?”, asks Morpheus.
“Because I don’t like the idea that I am not in control of my life”.
Well, that’s clear. As its definition would have it, fate would take control away from us. That means we have no control whatsoever on our life. Goodbye, free will! Whatever choice you make, it’s already written that you should make that choice. You think you are making a choice, but in the end, you really are not. There is nothing you can do to change what’s going to happen to you, good or bad. Things will happen the way they are meant to happen, whether you like it or not. Things have already been set in motion before you were even born. You are just a pawn, basically, nothing more.
In the end, how much control do we really have in this life? How much do we really control if we control anything at all? The question came to my head yet again today after I was reviewing the past few years of my life. I looked at my own life, my own “destiny”, “fate” if you will. Every choice, every word, every mistake, every win, every sin, every victory, every pain, every sorrow and joy, every encounter, have led me to where I am today.
My own voyage is a mystery to me. There is so much I don’t understand, so much I will never understand, so much I am not meant to understand. Today, I am a writer, which might be the last thing I expected to become, ever! I never thought I would become a writer. I never went through a specific curriculum to become a writer, or even anything that would intersect with writing, even remotely. Nothing I have ever done in my life, would have led me to writing. I mean, I have always liked telling stories, but it never occurred to me I would be doing this for a living now. I realized what my passion was well into my 30’s, which is apparently not wildly uncommon, but I would consider myself a late bloomer.
So, was I always destined to be a writer? I don’t think so or at the very least, I’d say I don’t know. As a kid, the only thing I wanted to become was a doctor. I fiercely admired my dad, and still do, and seeing him in that white coat, healing and helping people, put the calling in me. However, I then realized I frankly didn’t have discipline to be a doctor. All those hours in the library and then dealing with pain, suffering, death, blood and seeing people on the worst day of their lives; I simply couldn’t do it.
After flunking microbiology at the university, I worked and studied in finance. Still no sign, whatsoever that I should be a writer. There was no sign, not one single sign. Yet here I am today. I know everything I have ever been through led me to this very moment. So, has it always been my destiny? Or did my various choices lead me to where I am today?
I chose to write day and night. I chose to get better at my craft. I chose to fight like hell so I can be recognized by people and my peers as a writer. Those choices I made consciously. I mean I was the one who sat all these thousands of hours and wrote all these texts. I did it. I chose to do it, or did I? What if my destiny has always been to become a writer? What if that was always the plan? What if all the choices I made consciously were not choices in the end, but the illusion of choice?
That would mean I don’t really have free will, even if it’s promised for example in the Christian faith. As time goes by, I sincerely do not know what to believe. Black Jack Foley in the show Billions, says all the time “everything that is meant to happen, always does”. It’s his way of telling people not to fight fate and accept what’s about to come. He is also an ultra-rich prick who enjoys bending people to his will, so his motto, sounds more like a servitude slogan, for the servant to accept his/her fate that Foley will ultimately impose on them. Yet, that motto has some merit.
I do believe a bit in the “whatever is meant to happen, always does”. Perhaps I was meant to become a writer, perhaps that has always been my destiny. It matters not. I am loving it. Writing is the one thing I will never stop doing because my love for writing knows no bounds and its fire is inextinguishable.
Moreover, I believe in making my own choices. I believe in my free will and my free will compels me to keep writing. Who am I to disobey my own free will? I’ll keep making my own choices even if it might just be the illusion of choice. At least, I am happy when I make those “choices”.
Just one man’s opinion
Now smile and go on with your day!